DON'T LET GO

By Sara Lynn

 

*DO NOT ARCHIVE WITHOUT PERMISSION*

SPOILER WARNING: Set after Momento Mori

RATING: PG

CONTENT WARNING/CLASSIFICATION: MSR, VA

SUMMARY: Mulder can’t sleep and needs to run off some sexual energy.

DISCLAIMER: Fox Mulder & Dana Scully are creations of Chris*t* Carter (According to Creative Loafing) and owned by Twentieth Century Fox.

‘Don’t Let Go’ is by En Vogue and found on the ‘Set It Off’ Soundtrack

Watersgrave is actually a local alternative band. No, they are not found on any CD . . . yet.

 

* ~ * ~ *

 

Mulder couldn’t sleep. Nothing too strange about that. Tonight it was not because of nightmare involving his sister or little green men. This bout of insomnia was due to concern for the little red-haired girl next door.

Cramped quarters in the motel room. These nights prompted amazing dreams, but since the discovery of the tumor . . . those dreams were no longer few and in-between. For almost a month they were constant. Varied dreams of a long life with Scully as his wife, Scully as his lover, Scully . . . no longer alive. Those were the ones that kept him awake.

Mulder wrestled endlessly with himself. Why didn’t he do anything? What was stopping him from making those dreams reality? Surely anyone would understand the love he had for his partner of the last five years. So, why was it still unspoken of between the two of them?

Mulder walked aimlessly around the bed. This was pointless. Fox looked over himself and automatically reached for his running shoes. Sleep would come easier if he was tired. He dug out his walkman radio and started out the door.

The night air was crisp and gave Mulder a certain energy. He started walking slow, turning the knob on his radio. Nothing but static. He was ready to just cut it off and run in silence when he caught the tail end of a rock song.

" . . .That was Watersgrave with their latest release. Y’know . . ." Fox tuned out the remainder of the DJ’s speech. He noticed everything going on around him as he increased his speed down the hill. "Next is a request ‘To David - Love ya lots!’. . ."

Mulder laughed. People were so strange. Maybe if he had a song dedicated to him, it would be different. Mulder barely recognized the song, but seemed to understand every word being sung in his ear.

"What’s it gonna be . . . cause I can pretend.

Don’t you wanna be more than friends?

Hold me tight and don’t let go. Don’t let go!

You have the right to lose control. Don’t let go!"

‘Not half bad.’ Mulder began to breathe harder, as his feet rhythmically landed on the pavement.

"I often told myself that we could be more than just friends.

I know you think if we move too quick, it would all end . . ."

‘That’s true. Why rush head-on into things?’ Mulder could feel the asphalt through his shoes. He looked around and found himself in the center of a basketball court with only the moon to light the area. Next to one post was a ball some kid left. Fox took the chance and snatched the ball to shoot some hoops. ‘Sometimes it’s better to just be friends.’

"They’ll be some love-makin’, heart-breakin’, soul-shakin’ . . .

They’ll be some love-makin’, heart-breakin’, soul-shakin’ . . .

What’s it gonna be . . . cause I can pretend.

Don’t you wanna be more than friends?

Hold me tight and don’t let go. Don’t let go!

You have the right to lose control. Don’t let go!"

‘Don’t I know about pretending. I’ve been pretending for years.’ Mulder stopped. Listening to the words, his mind could only think of Scully.

"Running in and out my life, has caught me so confused.

You’ve got to make the sacrifice.

Somebody’s got to choose.

We can make it if we try, for the sake of you and I . . ."

‘Could we? Could we actually have it all? Or would we have to choose between work and our love? Could we make the sacrifice?’ Mulder shot for the basket, making it once more.

"What’s it gonna be . . . cause I can pretend . . .

. . .You can’t keep running into my life, outta my life, outta my life!

. . .Hold me tight and don’t let go. Don’t let go!

You have the right to lose control. Don’t let go!

You’ve got the right to lose control . . . I said you’ve got the right!"

Mulder caught the ball on the rebound, his thought on how he treated his partner. ‘She’s put up with so much and I keep jerking her around. Just because she’s my partner, what give me the right?’

"What’s it gonna be . . . cause I can pretend . . . Oh no!

Don’t you wanna be . . . Don’tcha wanna be! . . .More than friends . . . more than friends . . .

Hold me tight and don’t let go. Don’t let go!

You have the right to lose control . . ."

Fox click off his radio. Shaking his head, he looked up at the backboard. There was nothing stopping him from pursuing a relationship with Scully except himself. Doubt still lingered. Would it work? Would everything turn out right? He glanced back down at the ball. ‘OK, Fox, it’s up to fate. If you make it in the basket, you’re going back to motel and take this opportunity to make Dana know your feelings. If not, you’ve always got Miss April waiting at home.’

He could feel the sweat cover his hands. It was up to his athletic abilities and pure luck. He focused and let the ball go. Slow motion plagued Mulder as the ball sailed toward the hoop and went in. . . Nothing but net.

 

* ~ *

 

Dana laid on her stomach watching the movie. She didn’t care much what it was called, it didn’t seem to be putting her to sleep like she thought it would. At the moment she was trying to figure out who the murderer was before the detective.

The knock was so light, she barely thought she heard it. She got out of the bed and wandered over to the door. Through the slit between the window frame and curtain she could see Mulder looking nervous as he stood outside.

"Mulder?" She said opening the door for him. "What are you doing up so late?"

"Could ask you the same." He stepped into the room and went over to the TV, turning it off. Dana shook her head and shut the door behind her.

"Mulder, what do you want?"

With that, He pulled her to him and pressed her lips to his. Scully never fought it, half-wondering what brought about this surge of empowerment and reveling in his sweet taste with the other half. She pulled away from him, licking her lips. "I’m done pretending. I love you, Dana."

Their lips met softly once more, with a promise of more to come. Fox wanted them all now, but Dana had another idea as she pushed him back. "Why don’t you go take a shower? You smell awful ripe."

Mulder looked at Scully with a playful eye, before squeezing her to his body. He had sweated a lot and hadn’t wore a shirt. Pulling her close let him rub off onto her nice silk pajamas. She squealed in delight. Scully never had a reaction so female in front of him. He looked at her face with the same fun nature. "Y’know, I know I’ve said this before, but you smell bad." Mulder pulled Scully into his arms and carried her with him into the bathroom never letting go.

 

THE END