Gossip III
Feedback: Yes, please!!
Rating: PG-13
Category: MSR-H-V
Spoilers: Hollywood AD-Requiem-Dead Alive-Vienen
Disclaimer: Not mine; XF characters belong to 1013 Productions.
Summary: Dumb and Dumber strike again.
Notes: Written for Aud’s birthday. It’s all for you honey, and I hope you like it.
“Gossip III” is the third piece featuring Teresa and Janet from the secretarial pool.
As usual, big thanks to Tali and xdks for betaing this baby.
***
“Hi Janet”
“ Hi Teresa! Oh, I’m so excited today!”
“Why? Did you get your new vibrator in the mail ?”
“Don’t be so mean or I won’t share the news!”
“But you are just so easy to tease. Fine , what did you dig up? ”
“You know since Spooky came back from wherever he was - I never bought that ‘buried alive story’, I mean, come on, it’s the twenty first century - anyway, since he came back he’s been living at Doc Ice’s place.”
“Of course it makes sense; he knocked her up, ran away and is back his tail between his legs trying to make nice with the blimp from the basement! So what’s the hot news?”
“That’s just it; his official address is now at Doc Ice’s! I spoke to Sheila and she also hinted that they were planning to tie the knot!”
“Really? I bet she got pregnant purpose just to trap him. Probably couldn’t get a man any other way. Someone really needs to tell him that, these days, he’s not obligated to marry that whale just because she’s having his sprog!”
“Oo, someone is jealous. You are still hoping he’ll be interested in you, Teresa?”
“Oh, hey Kim. How are you doing?”
“Hi Janet, Teresa”
“So Kim, I was just telling Teresa the latest about Mr and Mrs Spooky. You know them, what do you think - is Spooky really in love with Doc Ice?”
“I can tell you far more than that, just to get the record straight and stop the gossip mill once and for all! Agent Mulder resigned this morning, so it’s not top secret anymore. Agents Scully and Mulder won’t be tying the knot soon because they already did!”
“What?!”
“Close your mouth, Janet, or you’re going to catch flies! So spill the beans, Kim, some people have to get back to work!”
“Do you remember the time when AD Skinner was in LA for the movie premiere? Mulder and Scully attended too, well one thing lead to another and they drove down to Vegas and got married. Not long after that, Mulder disappeared on a case in Bellefleur. That’s when Dana discovered she was pregnant.”
“How convenient for Mulder to disappear just when Doc Ice learn about the pregnancy!”
“If you don’t believe me, just check their marriage license, it’s public record. But it won’t change the fact that they are truly married, living together and having a baby. Just face it Teresa, you never stood a chance. Oh, look at the time! I have to run! Have a nice day, ladies.”
**
“Who was it, on the phone?”
“It was Kim”
“What did she want?”
“She ran into Dumb and Dumber during her coffee break and she kind of broke the news to them. She just wanted to tell me what happened!”
“What did she tell them?”
“That we love each other, that we got married in Las Vegas last year and that you really didn’t just run off when you found out I was pregnant. Oh Mulder, Kim said it was the most fun she’s had all week.”
“I’d love to have seen their faces when she broke the news!”
“Teresa’s face was green, it even showed through all the layers of make up she wears, trying to make herself look ten years younger! Janet just stood there with her mouth hanging open, as usual!”
“You and Kim seem really close now.”
“Yeah, she’s been so supportive since I found out I was pregnant. I was so lost.”
“Oh baby, please don’t be sad.”
“Pregnancy hormones are a bitch…I’ve cried more in these last few months than I have since I left Med School.”
“You need a distraction…how about this…?”
“Mulderrrr…”
“Or this…”
“Oh yes, lower…don’t stop…right here…”
“Ooh, Scully you know what I like…pregnancy undies…my favourite”
“Shut up Mulder!”
.